Home Post 1234-chapter-91

1234-chapter-91

As I felt the ground rapidly approach, my knees buckled, and I involuntarily shut my eyes. That’s when I felt strong arms wrap around my waist, steadying my tilted upper body and the hair that had cascaded down.

When I inadvertently turned my head, the sight of the face that had moved closer startled me, sending my already fluttering heart racing in a different way.

“Th, thank you.”

“After yesterday’s incident, it seems your body might still be unwell, Lily. It’s odd for me to say this but, um… Take a few days off if you need to. There won’t be any issues.”

As I stood straight, I swallowed hard and rubbed my cold hands. Lilith’s voice was no longer audible, but I felt as if I could hear laughter around me, which kept my nerves on edge.

The look of concern was evident on his sharply featured face.

It wasn’t that he didn’t remember. He had chosen not to show it. Compared to Damian and Regulus, who had made it quite obvious, it was his mature consideration. After holding eye contact for quite some time, he coughed awkwardly but also smiled faintly.

Lilith’s earlier rebuke about my frustrating behavior muddled my thoughts again. Glancing at his face as if gauging his reaction, I pursed and then moved my lips several times before finally speaking.

“I’m fine, really. And thank you for not bringing up the….the dream.”

“Thank you?”

“…Because you didn’t say anything.”

Odil looked puzzled. Seeing him like this, after being repeatedly urged, somehow made me feel more at ease.

I hesitantly took the first steps, Odil maintained a suitable distance and followed. I held the hem of my skirt and continued speaking slowly.

“I needed time to….sort out my thoughts. Neither Damian nor Regulus did that, so I ended up fleeing. Both initially thought it was just a dream, as did I. It’s because nothing like that had ever happened before.”

As we walked up the stairs, my pace slowed. I wasn’t sure what expression Odil was making, but it felt too awkward to meet his eyes. As I focused straight ahead, I kept talking.

“I felt like everyone would bring up the dream and press the issue just like Damian and Regulus did. But Odil didn’t show any signs of that…. which made me feel somewhat relieved.”

That’s probably why I was able to talk about it. Part of me was also afraid that I might blurt out something embarrassingly affectionate like Lilith’s comment, ‘My cuties, of course, I like you!’

I felt a bit more at ease than before. As I glanced along the corridor from the railing while climbing the stairs, I suddenly realized that Odil had stopped on the landing. Turning around, I saw him looking somewhat dazed.

“Odil?”

As our eyes met, he blushed up to his ears and started to back away, which made me tilt my head.

“What’s going on?”

“The dream, the, I mean, that…”

“Yes?”

“Was it… not a dream? Yesterday…”

Watching him avoid my gaze and stutter, my heart dropped. Wait, why is he reacting like this? His voice was trembling badly as he spoke through his teeth.

“You, you mentioned a dream earlier, right?”

“That, I mean, the dream was so vivid, I wanted to make sure everything was alright…”

My cheeks and forehead started to heat up.

I had misunderstood him. To the person thinking it was just a simple dream, I blurted out that it wasn’t. My mind went blank, and cold sweat ran down my back. Odil covered his mouth with his hand and said,

“…I’m sorry.”

“Why, why do you speak! Like that!”

“Don’t worry about it. It’s okay! It wasn’t intentional. Just calm down.”

“No, why even give room for such misunderstanding!”

I was embarrassed to death. If only I had kept quiet!

My mind was a mess, I didn’t even know what I was saying, and I just wanted to disappear into the ground. Odil, who looked as flustered as I felt, kept moving his lips, then took my hand and gently pulled me.

My head was spinning from the heat, and as I reached the top of the stairs, I found the storeroom door locked, and I didn’t have the key.

I remembered Odil once telling me that there was only one key, and I needed to be careful not to lose it when I first became the storeroom keeper… It must be in the room? I had intended to cast a spell to prevent it from getting lost, but had completely forgotten to do so.

However, Odil then pulled out a key from his pocket and unlocked the door. Before I could even express my surprise, he pulled me inside. Inside the familiar-scented space, I looked back and forth between the key in Odil’s hand and his face.

“Was there another key? I thought there was only one…”

“Ah, this one can open all the rooms in the building.”

Odil explained, holding up the nondescript silver key, clearly different from mine.

After our brief conversation, an awkward silence followed. Odil moved hesitantly towards the sofa, set down some documents on the table, and spoke.

“Lily, as I said earlier, you really don’t need to worry about it. If you want to forget, I won’t press the issue. So.”

He didn’t finish his sentence, but I understood what he meant. He was asking me not to suddenly disappear like before, as it seemed to have left a profound impact on him. I nodded awkwardly and fidgeted with my interlocked fingers.

“He says that, but it seems like he’s really concerned?”

After a long silence, Lilith’s voice suddenly broke through, and though I was startled, I couldn’t help but nod in agreement. Despite his assurances, Odil’s complex expressions and constant gaze made it obvious that he was worried.

He said he was going to work but he stood there motionless while stealing glances at me.

What should I do…? I remembered how he had continually brought my fingers to his lips, which made me hide my hands behind me. Lilith commented in a frustrated tone.

“Are you still going to be like this? It’s so frustrating, Lily. Why can’t you speak up? Why?”

“Because…”

Because it’s embarrassing. Because it’s awkward. Because I don’t know what to say. My mind was flooded with all sorts of thoughts.

I heard him click his tongue.

“If you keep running away, it’s even more embarrassing and awkward. Alright, if you keep this up, then I’ll have to…”

“Odil, Odil, when you said the dream was vivid, did you not like yesterday’s dream?”

“What? No, not at all. I liked it! I’d even want to dream about it again if possible…!”

“…”

“…umm.”

I clenched my skirt tightly and walked over to the sofa to sit across from him. My legs were shaking so much that I felt I might collapse if I remained standing. I knew it wasn’t polite, but I looked down and muttered,

“I really wanted to pretend it didn’t happen and just run away.”

“Running away, that’s… problematic.”

“I mean, when Damian and Regulus woke up, they brought it up immediately, so I didn’t even have time to sort my thoughts.”

It wasn’t like my mind was clear now, but it was certainly better than being with them. Odil wasn’t rushing me for answers or prying mischievously. Plus, since he was intentionally looking down, I couldn’t see his expression, which made me feel more at ease.

A shadow moved at the edge of my vision. After waiting for Odil to sit across from me, he continued speaking calmly, still with his head down.

“What did you mean when you said you were worried?”

“It was because the expression I saw on your face just before you woke from the dream wasn’t good.”

“Ah.”

“….Even though I heard what I wanted from the person I wanted, I couldn’t really believe it was true.”

Odil hesitated before adding these words. It was more the shock that he had not believed any of it to be true than the embarrassment, which made my heart flutter unexpectedly. Slowly, I lifted my head.

With his legs set apart at a comfortable stride, fists clenched over his knees, back straightened, and body facing directly towards me, his initially stiff expression softened into a lazy smile as our eyes met.

Startled by his sudden warmth, I quickly averted my gaze, feeling my face heat up.

“Odil has become quite affectionate, hasn’t he? He used to be so prickly.”

Lilith’s comment seemed to suggest that Odil had changed significantly. I shook my head. It wouldn’t be natural for anyone to speak kindly of someone who had caused them such turmoil.

“But wasn’t Odil always kind?”

He was always responsible and strict with himself, but that didn’t mean he lacked kindness. The first time I met him, he had asked me if I was okay with a face full of concern. Recalling that worried expression helped calm the fluttering in my chest.

“Odil, did you truly never dislike me?”

This time, my question wasn’t spurred by panic or overwhelming emotion.

“I don’t know. It wasn’t peaceful, but there was nothing particularly problematic about my life until you guys came along and turned everything upside down. The things I said in the dream, they were all true. I can’t imagine liking anyone else but you guys.”

My voice was steady, showing no tremor. Odil’s blue eyes widened in surprise. I licked my dry lips before continuing.

“Do I really deserve to like you all?”

“Deserve? Have you been worrying about that this whole time?”

“I have no choice but to worry. If you ask around, everyone would speak ill of me. Or rather, they’d put it nicely, but some might say they can’t understand or forgive me. I’m scared and afraid of all that, so I’d rather avoid and run away. That’s why…”

Why all this had to happen to me, why it had to be me, I wanted to escape from everything. It wasn’t that I had suddenly found courage.

“Don’t run away.”

Lilith’s words echoed in my head again. After closing my eyes tightly and reopening them, I stared directly at him, who was looking back at me with an expressionless face.

“So, that’s why I’m saying this. I guess I don’t want to run away anymore.”

He was the beginning of my turmoil.

As if a flower bud was bursting open, Lilith’s laughter filled my ears, creating a dizzying effect.

 

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