Home Post 1615-chapter-188


In an instant, the room fell silent. And before I could even think—

‘What’s happening?’

—Amber screamed.


Her expression was a chaotic mix of shock and joy.

“Amber, quiet.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

Lucian also looked at me with a strange expression, his golden eyes sparkling with a certain expectation amid his puzzled look.

“Amber, fetch the doctor immediately.”


Abandoning the task of setting the table, Amber dashed out of the room. It was so different from her usual manner, no matter how busy she was.

“What’s going on?”

I asked, clearly bewildered. However, instead of answering, Lucian kept glancing between my face and my stomach.

Only then did I begin to understand the situation.

“…No way.”


His expression grew more serious. Though we hadn’t discussed it, we both harbored fears about having children. Both of us had endured difficult childhoods.

Could we ensure our child grows up happily?

Could I be a good parent? Really?

I felt a sense of kinship with the children we recently brought to the mansion. The feelings I had from my time in the orphanage resurfaced, making me feel empathy for Tommy and the other parentless children.

Still, my own child would be different.

I would carry it for nine months and then take care of it myself.

…Could I do that? Could Lucian?

My expression hardened involuntarily. Sensing this, he whispered soothingly.

“…It’s okay. It might not be.”

It seemed he also didn’t want a child. His words, hoping it wasn’t the case, brought me relief and disappointment.

“…I’m not sure.”

Though clueless about parenting, I couldn’t help but dream of the future.

Wouldn’t it be joyful to see a child resembling him? Though it was brief, it felt like time had stretched out for us. The doctor hurried into the room with Amber and rushed to my side.

Gasp, gasp, excuse me, Madam.”

He took a deep breath and gently grasped my wrist, closing his eyes as he carefully tried to sense something.

“Hmm… It’s not clear yet, but it might be too early to tell.”

Lucian and I were too anxious to respond. We just watched the doctor’s every move, filled with fear.

“She gagged at the smell of meat. What clearer sign is there? Please check again.”

As Amber insisted, the doctor, looking determined, took something out of his bag.

“This is a magic tool I recently acquired. It was created by a former Archmage for his sister to test for pregnancy. However…”

As he spoke confidently, he glanced nervously at Lucian.

“It requires a small blood sample.”


Lucian replied instantly as soon as the doctor finished speaking.

“…It’s alright, Luci.”

Before coming here, I had given blood for a health check, so his firm stance took me by surprise.

Despite my reassurance, Lucian’s stance didn’t waver.

“We will find out soon over time. I can’t give my wife’s blood.”

Though he had a point, I couldn’t wait that long. The uncertainty was unbearable. What if I was pregnant and unprepared?

Sensing my anxiety, Lucian pulled me into a firm embrace.

He tilted his head slightly, gazing at me intently. After a moment, he sighed deeply and turned to face the doctor.

“…How much blood is needed?”

The doctor, who had been nervously awaiting his answer, quickly answered.

“A single drop will suffice, Your Grace.”

“…Then, ensure she feels no pain. Be quick and precise.”


The doctor hurriedly retrieved a thin box from his bag, pulling out a slender needle-like instrument.

“Then, excuse me, Madam.”

I extended my hand, and the doctor carefully supported it while swiftly pricking my fingertip.

It stung, but I didn’t show it. I didn’t want the doctor to face any backlash.

The doctor took just one drop of blood from my fingertip and placed it onto the magic tool. Then, he reached into his coat for a handkerchief to stop the bleeding, but Lucian was quicker. He grasped my wrist and brought my finger to his mouth.

The warm, wet sensation of his tongue against my fingertip took me by surprise.

As he looked up at me with my finger in his mouth, I was too stunned to speak. I could only stare, mesmerized by the sensation of his tongue wrapping around my fingertip and the gentle pressure as he sucked on it.

After a few moments, he reluctantly let go.


I wanted to scold him, to ask what he was doing, though I couldn’t finish it. Instead, I just glared at him and screamed inside.

‘What is he doing in front of Amber and the doctor?’

While I was left speechless, the doctor activated the device.


A strange hum filled the room, and the device emitted a bright light.

Lucian and I turned to look. The tool that had been shining light, then the light faded. The doctor peered into a small opening in the tool.

“…Has it given a result already?”

I asked, my voice trembling with a mix of anxiety and anticipation. The thought of having a child who looked like Lucian was wonderful, but I doubted my ability to raise one. What if our child grew up unhappy, just like we did?

My heart pounded in my chest, and I felt dizzy. I stared at the doctor, waiting for his words.

“I’m sorry, but…”

Lucian sighed deeply at the short words.

“So, it’s a no.”

“Yes. That’s unfortunate, Your Grace.”

The doctor looked genuinely disappointed. Amber’s expression was the same. They had a look full of sympathy as if I had desperately wanted to be pregnant and was now disappointed. It made sense that parents would generally hope for children after marriage.

Amber insisted to the doctor as she looked at me sadly.

“But she definitely was nauseous.”

“Yes… that is concerning. Madam, if you don’t mind, please excuse me.”


The doctor pressed his fingers to my wrist and closed his eyes, concentrating deeply.


After carefully examining my complexion, he took out various medical instruments and examined me thoroughly.

“She mentioned feeling unusually tired.”

“Is that so? She does have a slight fever.”

“Could it be an illness?”

Lucian’s voice was filled with concern. The doctor put away his instruments and put them into the bag.

“There doesn’t seem to be anything seriously wrong, Your Grace. It appears that the Madam is simply exhausted.”

“I see.”

“Yes, she has been handling many tasks recently. While Your Grace is accustomed to rigorous activity, the Madam is not.”


“I don’t think I’m that unwell…”

“Still, if you were nauseous, it means that you need enough rest. It’s your body’s way of demanding a break.”


The doctor’s words made sense. It was reassuring to know I wasn’t pregnant, easing my mind significantly.

“I’ll prepare a tonic to help restore your strength. Have a light meal and get a good night’s sleep.”

“Yes, I understood.”

Amber, who had been listening quietly, swiftly cleared the food from the table and placed it back on the trolley.

“It’s cooled down, so I’ll bring fresh dishes. Please wait a moment!”

As she left the room quickly, her expression was filled with regret.

“I’ll take my leave now and bring the tonic as soon as it’s ready.”

“Very well.”

As soon as the doctor left, Lucian pulled me into a tight hug. He held me on his lap, and I nestled in his arms.

I felt his heart pounding against mine.

It was comforting to realize I wasn’t the only one who had been anxious. Despite the comfort, I couldn’t shake the memory of what he said earlier. With my face buried in his shoulder, I had to ask.

“…Luci, do you not want children?”

I understood his concerns, as I felt the same way, though the feeling of being rejected still stung.


Lucian didn’t answer immediately. Instead, he gently stroked my hair. Sometimes, not answering spoke volumes.

“I’m scared too, but… I can’t help but wonder a little. What would Luci and my child be like?”

His hand on my back was gentle and warm.

“…It’s not that I don’t want to.”

Lucian whispered in my ear. He paused for a moment before continuing slowly.

“Ray, if we had a daughter who looked just like you, I’d be happy. But if we had a son who looked like me? How would I treat him?”

He was grappling with the same fears I had.

“I can’t even imagine it. Raising a son who looks like me… expecting him to grow up as I did seems too cruel.”